IVF 2.0 CD1

My lovely Aunt Flo arrived yesterday.  She started off as a trickle, so my first inclination was that this was the calm before the storm. Yet today it's trickled off.  I recall a similar thing happening the last time I was on BCPs.  With that said, I called the clinic this morning and declared yesterday as CD1.  The nurse I spoke with asked me to go to my local lab to get a blood test today and then tomorrow I have an appointment with the nurse to get my prescription and be retrained for my injections.  I was under the assumption that I was going to be on the exact same protocol but she informed me that instead of Puregon, I'll be on Menopur instead.  I do recall that my RE wanted me to incorporate LH into my injections.  Unfortunately I have a box of Puregon in my fridge and now I won't be able to use it.  I'll double check tomorrow if I'm truly on a different protocol, but if so, it looks like I have a box of Puregon (follistim) for sale. Anyone interested?

On another note, my friends from Atlanta are here.  We are having a blast.  It's just been 4 days of laughter.  Laughter must be good for my health right now.  Though we've been running around a lot, seeing the sights, their visit has been exactly what I needed at this time. I haven't been preoccupied with the start of this IVF cycle which I think it good for my mental health.  And though I have indulged in a beer or two these past few days, I will completely refrain once I start my injections.     

Sunshine and disappointment

It appears that spring has finally arrived in southern British Columbia.  For the past few days, we've experienced relatively good weather.  Sweets and I have enjoyed our afternoons and evenings gardening in our little backyard.  Since the weather has been so great, we finally picked up a love seat his parents have been holding on for us.  It's been a while since I've driven a pick-up, especially in lower mainland traffic, but we survived the trip there and back and neither the love seat nor the truck were damaged. However, I think I screwed up.  I was expecting Sweets's father to help us with the love seat, but I forgot that he injured his back.  So I helped move the love seat.  It was light; it was super easy to move and I felt no strain in lifting it.  But I'm not supposed to pick up heavy items during this two week wait.  And I did.  I think I fucked up.  What if my momentary lapse has lead to this cycle being a bust?

I've been having cramps on and on literally since the transfer.  I took a home pregnancy test 9 days after transfer and it was a BFN.  My period was due around the 8th, and it's not here yet.  But, my period was a week late last time.  It's been two weeks today since my transfer and this morning I woke with intensified cramps. Not painful, but more "present" than the previous cramps I've been experiencing.  Every time I've had a treatment, my period either arrived two weeks after the treatment or on the day my period was due.  I guess I'm on schedule as I'm pretty sure I'm getting my period today.  

  

POAS this morning

It was a BFN.  I'm hoping it's too soon.  It was a cheapo dollar HPT so hopefully it's not sensitive enough to detect low levels of HCG.  But, I'm still cramping.  It is a bit strange.  It's constant and kind of in the upper part of my tummy.  I bet you tomorrow I'll be greeted by spotting.  Argh.

Is that a Rubenesque woman I hear singing?

I'm cramping up a storm.  Sure, I can try to remain optimistic and think, "Maybe it's my uterus expanding" but I'm sure it's my period announcing its arrival shortly.  I expect it to arrive by Wednesday or Thursday.  Just to humour myself, I'll POAS tomorrow.  I anticipate that it'll be a BFN.


Yesterday, my friend Nicole had a baby girl.  I'm happy for her but wish it was me.  She got married last July and was pregnant by September.  The day that she announced her pregnancy to the staff at school, I had my first IUI BFN.  I did not handle it well.  In fact, I broke down in tears just before teaching my Socials 11 class.  Thankfully I pulled myself together and finished teaching the class.  You know, in the past 6 weeks, I've had four friends give birth and in a couple weeks another one is due.  Fuckedy fuck fuck.  


To add more shit to this shit pile, Vancouver is being demolished in Boston.  Crap.  

Mother Nature is a tease *Update*

My period is three days late.  My period is never late.  The latest it's ever been was two days and even then, the flow started to happen the evening of the second day.  Here I am on day three, and still no spotting.  I've been having mild cramping on and off over the past week.  Even with my IVF cycle, even with all the medications I was on, my period arrived on time, 5 days before my beta appointment.  I'm trying not to get excited, because I've been so disappointed in the past.  I honestly don't think I'm pregnant, but of course I hope I am.  My husband has been out of town for the past week for work, and I haven't informed him of AF being MIA.  Not only does he need to focus on his work, but I don't want to get him too excited, only to be disappointed if AF arrives.  Also, I've avoided home pregnancy tests because I don't want to be crushed.  In my odd way of thinking, POAS would mean that I think there's an actual chance that I'm pregnant.  Like I would be jinxing it and then it would never happen. Surely this evening, AF will arrive; I'll allow myself a little cry and mourn the loss of yet another cycle.  But for now, I would like to remain in this moment of possibilities of "if" for a little longer.

If this natural cycle is a bust, I start my FET cycle.  I've got the Estradot and Crinone ready to go.  Here's hoping that I won't be needing them.    

**Update**
Still no AF.  Five days late.  I took two cheapy HPT this morning = BFN.  I've been reading up on it on fertility boards and this appears to be pretty routine.  Most women, after an IVF cycle, are late for their second cycle.  One poster mentioned that AF is typically 7 days to two weeks late.  Ugh!  Tomorrow I will be calling my RE's office to find out what I should be doing.  Do I start the meds?  Do I wait until AF?  I just want to get started with this cycle.