It appears I haven't written anything in awhile. In all honesty, there hasn't been a lot to write about. I'm not one to ponder on the mundane moments in my life. If I don't give it a second thought, why would anyone else want to read about it? Truthfully, it just feels like everything is just moving in slow motion right now. Like my world is in suspended animation.
I've spent a lot of my adult life on hold, playing a waiting game of sorts. I had to wait a long time to get a full time contract - longer than most of my colleagues. I had a long engagement. We waited for Sweet Cheeks to get established in his career. Then we waited a long time to purchase a new home. And as of late, I've been waiting to get pregnant.
While I've been waiting, the world has been whizzing by. Sometimes I feel as though I can join in, but mostly, I just feel like I'm on hold. It's as if I move from one waiting room to another. In each room, I take a number a listen with anticipation for it be called. It never seems to come.
One more week. I have one more week on my BCP and then a new waiting game starts.
I do too feel sometimes that I am always waiting... waiting to start the new cycle, waiting to get AF, waiting to start BCP (which is never ending popping one little pill every night), waiting for stims, for HSG shot, for ER, for news, always waiting to get that dread telephone call. I does get really frustrating.
ReplyDeleteI do hope that the last week of BCP will fly by and you'll get into some less boring stuff.
Hurry up and wait! Sucks! I hope you are hanging in there.
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